How Can I Support A Child If I Can’t Support Myself?

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My girlfriend and I had been dating for about two years. Everything was great. We were both full-time college students, with part-time jobs. My girlfriend lived with her parents and I lived in the dorms at the school. We did not see each other much during the week, because we were both so busy between school and work, but we tried to save the weekends for each other. This seemed to work out well, making sure we did not get sick of each other!

Being that I only worked part-time, I was not exactly rolling in the dough. Lucky for me, my parents were extremely supportive of my wanting to go to school full-time and focusing mainly on my education. They deposited money into my bank account each week for food and anything I needed for school. Anything extra though, I had to pay for myself, hence the part-time job.

One weekend, while my girlfriend’s parents were out of town, we thought it would be fun to spend the whole weekend together, as if we were married. We cooked together, we ate together, we watched movies together, and we slept together. It was an amazing weekend. I did not want it to end, but like most good things, it did. And there I was heading back to school, fantasizing about what life would be like when we were older and really were married, what it would be like when we were real grown ups. If only I knew then, how soon I would have to grow up.

A month or so went by, and everything was going well. School was good, work was good, and we were great, so I found it weird, when one day I did not hear from her. Then it was two days, I tried calling, no answer. I figured maybe she had a lot of homework or something, so I decided to wait until the weekend. If I had not heard from her by then, I would make a trip over to her house.

The weekend came, and still nothing. I marched myself down to her house, and banged on the door. Her mother answered the door, and said she had been locked in her room for days. She asked me if I knew what was going on, I explained that I was wondering the same thing. I made my way upstairs and knocked gently on the door, not wanting to scare her. I wanted to be able to help her through whatever was bothering her. When she opened the door, and I saw her beautiful face stained with tears, all I could do was hug her. I held on to her tight and told her to please let me help, to please tell me what was going on. She told me to sit down, and I was not expecting what came out of her mouth next.

Pregnant. My girlfriend was pregnant. She was going to be having a baby. We were going to be having a baby. So many thoughts were running through my head, I thought it was going to explode. Either that, or pass out, at least then I could wake up and for a few more seconds I could pretend it was all just a dream. How did I even respond to her? I could not think of even one right thing to say in this situation. Everything I wanted to say sounded horrible, even in my head. So, what did I say? Probably the stupidest thing I could of possibly said. “We are getting an abortion, right...?” Well, that got me thrown out of the house.

On the drive back to my dorm, all I could think about, was what on Earth we were going to do. I knew there was no way my girlfriend would actually go through with an abortion. Maybe adoption? There is no way she could possibly think that we were capable of raising a child. We were practically still children ourselves. I still brought my laundry home for my mom to do on the weekends, for pete’s sake!

I had no one to talk to. I could not possibly tell my parents. They would have killed me. Well, realistically, they probably would have just cut me off. But, at that point, they may as well kill me, because my little piddly job was not going to pay for diddly. How could I support a baby, when I could not even support myself? I had to talk to my girlfriend. We had to figure this out.

To Be Continued...


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By Lauren DiCamillo of Expecting Parents Alliance of America


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